Need help responding to these three post

Guided Response: Respond to the thoughts presented by your classmates in a way that furthers and deepens the conversation. You might, for example, share an example in your own life that relates to the experiences they shared. You might add further thoughts to their answers to the questions. You might offer other ways in which we can learn to embody the kind of humility that the speaker advocates. In any case, let your response further the goal of the learning from arguments.

w5 d1    Stacey Martinez Email this Author             3/9/2017 7:33:15 AM

            I read the instructions to do this discussion and automatically thought of a life experience that I had with my husband years ago. I thought maybe it was a little too much but then rethought and decided to write on it anyway. So years ago my husband and I had troubles. It wasn't just one of us but both of us letting life and temptations get to us. We were both off doing our own things, I feel like I lost myself and I got into doing drugs. I lost myself. Well one day my husband had enough and decided to leave me, he let the influence of his parents run what he did. The argument and what to do starts here. I thought that this was wrong because I think when someone is hurting that you love you need to be there and stand up for them especially when they are lost and weakened because of you.

            His parents said to leave me flat out. Now we had been together for more than ten years, we are high school sweet hearts. My argument that I had to talk him into if he still wanted it to work was to help me be clean and stand by myside and not let his parents influence him like he was letting them do. After a few days we talked and I let myself detox and get clean. We both had a chance to critically think and do and act in a way we knew was good for us. He stood by me and helped me get clean. He is an awesome man and I love him for saving me.

            Though this process worked I later talked to him and argued my point that his way of doing this was wrong. We can go back and forth with some good premises on this situation but the conclusion of what we wanted worked out, in the end we actually agreed on what we needed and it worked.

            This approach did not work at first but then after discussing and critically thinking things out really worked. My new conclusion in to use what my family and I have been through and help others. Some may be helped by a blunt situation of change in the hard way but others may need to know that the people they love want to see them get better and know they are there for them know matter what. My thinking on this is that you need to know the person and argue the point to help the person in the best way.

The Virtues of Critical Thinkers      Kawanda Murphy Email this Author             3/9/2017 2:18:35 PM

What is an area of life in which you have experienced people treating arguments as a kind of war?  Recently, I experienced an argument in my personal that was treated as a kind of war.  My little cousin told my uncle's wife that I yelled at her and she texted my phone treating and cursing at me. She did not give me the opportunity to explain what happened. It was like we were at war with each other about who was right and was wrong.

What were the consequences of that approach?  My uncle's wife and I stoooed speaking for a few days and I was prepared to cut all ties with my uncle's wife and my little cousin. I felt that we were argueing over something petty, although, I did speak with my little cousin about some things I did not yell at her. I felt like I was treated and cursed at for no reason.

What is an area of life in which you have experienced people treating arguments as a kind of performance?  I have experienced people treating arguments as a kind of performance in both my personal, social, and work life.  One particular time was when I was working at McDonald's and shift leder was upset with me because customers were asking me to cook there food. I was origanally working as a cashier but one day we were short on workers and I helped cook on the grill and the manager had me on the grilk and cash register. The customers always said my food was fresh and good and the shift leader argued with me stating that I don't see what you do so special because I cook my food the same way.  I just said okay to stop the argument from escalating any further.

Was the approach effective?  Yes, the spproach was effective because, although, I knew that her assessment was false I made it my goal to not let the appreciation from the customers get to ego. The shift leader and I began helping each other and we no longer argued about how the other person performed on the job.

Why is it better to treat arguments as a venue for learning?  It is better to treat arguments as a venue for learning because, it will allow you to identify the things that make you deliver negative criticism and ways to work on it. It is easier for some people to argue in a negative manner, rather, than having your own opinions about situations and remain in a positive state.

What traits of charater does it require to be able to live according to that approach?  Individuals can approach opposing ideas under the assumption that they could be true, even though you may want to disagree. Individuals should make it a goal to understand the other person argument instead of looking for reasons to contradict their argument.

What benefits can it have in our lives to take that approach?  If an individual take the above approach it will help them develop the skills and character needed to make good decision and decrease the chances of getting into heated arguments and creating negative feedback.

                The Virtues of Critical Thinkers    Indira Barros Email this Author    3/9/2017 6:25:12 PM

What is an area of life in which you have experienced people treating arguments as a kind of war?

For this question I would have to tap into a personal matter. For years I've seen my step dad drink alcohol, he's an alcoholic and refuses to admit that he has drinking problem. My mom always tries to keep the peace because she knows when he's inebriated it's easy for him to pick fights and arguments. The discussion of him drinking too much is always an argument of war between my parents. It's such a sad sight to experience.

What were the consequences of that approach?

The consequences of my mother approaching my dad about his drinking habits resort to anger, hurt and dismay between them both.

What is an area of life in which you have experienced people treating arguments as a kind of performance?

I've realized in the past my dad will raise his voice louder and act angry so that we would refrain from telling him anything about his alcohol consumption

Was that approach effective?

The approach was effective at times but then again we knew what his schemes were so we had to be firm and concise when we addressed the situation in love.

Why is it better to treat arguments as a venue for learning?

It's always better to treat an argument as a venue for learning. I draw comparison to the principal of charity. We should judge others and their ideas fairly, even if we may be less than inclined to do so (Hardy, J., Foster, C., & Zúñiga y Postigo, G. 2015).

What traits of character does it require to be able to live according to that approach?

Traits of charter would firstly be humble, empathetic, critical thinker and a noble person.

What benefits can it have in our lives to take that approach? (please give a specific example)

When we take these traits of charter to approach an argument, it doesn't necessarily mean we lose the argument it means that we take the time to analyze a situation before getting defensive or aggravated when you can't get your point across or disagree with the other person's point of view. For example my step dad. Had me, my siblings or my mother get into a rage when discussing his addition to alcohol it would 100% turn into an argument or altercation but we have been working with him and talking the time to understand him and help him figure out the root to his addiction. It's not easy but it's the best thing to do when you care about your love ones. It gives you a sense of peace.