I Need help editing an essay that is already done as a final essay but it needs some improvements. I will provide with the comments that need to be improved in the essay. It has to be a MAJOR IMPROVEMENT.

Some things to consider for revisions:

When using quotes, it is much more effective to explain the context of the quote (what the writer is discussing in the actual text from which the quote comes) and introduce it with our own words (instead of merely “dropping” the quote into the essay). Remember, if you are using a quote for support, you need to develop that quote as much as possible so the reader is on the exact same page as you. Your evidence, which is a huge chunk of your body paragraph, should consist of contextualizing, introducing, and explaining your quote, both its meaning and its significance in regards to your overall thesis or focus of the paper.

Additionally, when it comes to your organization, it looks like you are still using a “Five-Paragraph essay” format; we need to move beyond that format and figure out how our ideas connect together. If you think about it, I could have moved the majority of your body paragraphs around and put them in a different order and it would not have changed the essay at all. That is not a good thing; the essay should change if we change the order of your paragraphs around. We need to start thinking about which idea makes the most sense to start with and which ideas should logically come afterwards.

• 1496122240-School Grading and Innovation .docx
• 1496122243-WRITING PROMPT 1.docx

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Status NEW Posted 30 May 2017 05:05 AM My Price 7.00

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file 1496122249-Solutions file.docx preview (51 words )

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