My paper is attached.

This is what the teacher wrote for feedback to my assignment:

 

I read your version of the fairy tale, "Cinderella". Outside of the cat telling the story, the rest of the fairy tale is too similar to the original version. The objective of this assignment is to encourage students to use their creativity and use of imagination to change the original version of a fairy tale and re-write it differently through the minor character's perspective. Your submission talked about the wicked stepmother and the ugly sisters, which was the same as the original version. You also mentioned the ball at the court and the stepmother and sisters attending and not Cinderella, which was the same as the original version. Cinderella attends the ball at the court wearing a beautiful dress and slippers all provided by her godmother, which was the same as the original version. In the end, she marries her prince, but this part was left out of the Detailed Scenes.

 

The Detailed Scenes was supposed to be written in paragraph form instead of numbering the scenes. It should have read like a story. I would like for you to re-submit this fairy tale because of so many similarities to the original version. For your selection of the minor character, you could have used one of the ugly stepsisters because in the original version, it talks about the sisters as a whole and doesn't really concentrate of either of them. If you wanted to use the cat, think of how you could enhance his role to be an active participant in place of not being able to do nothing.

 

And this was the original directions:

 

Rewrite a fairy tale from the perspective of one of the minor characters in the story. Remember this is where you get to use your creativity and use of imagination to change the minor character's perspective of the story. When selecting the minor character, be careful who your minor character is, for example, if your selection was the fairy tale, "The Three Bears", your minor character would not be the Goldilocks or Baby Bear. Here is a brief example of how I changed the minor character, Papa Bear in the fairy tale, "Goldilocks and the Three Bears".

 

Instead of Papa Bear sitting down to eat his porridge and it was too hot, Mama Bear served Papa Bear Fruit Loops and hot cocoa. He decided the family should take a walk in the woods because he said the Fruit Loops were too crunchy to eat and the cocoa was too hot to drink. As they were walking in the woods, Papa Bear spotted a resort called "Bears Are Us". He thought it would be fun for his family to enjoy time spent away from home because they hadn't had a vacation in a long time. In the meantime, Goldilocks saw a small beautiful cottage. She decided to stop by because she was tired of walking in the woods and she was so happy to see this beautiful cottage. She knocked on the door once, but no one answered. She knocked on the door twice, but no one answered. The third time she knocked and no one answered, she decided to open the door... And the fairy tale goes on...

 

See how I changed the minor character, Papa Bear? Please do not use this fairy tale because I have already used it as an example.

 

To depict your story, follow the directions below:

 

• Create at least (4 to 5) brief journal entries from the perspective of the minor character: share any of the minor character's personal thoughts that are important to note as a journal entry.
• Provide a detailed outline of how you would rewrite the story if it was written from the minor character's viewpoint.
• An outline is separated into sections marked with Roman Numerals (I, II, III, IV...) or Uppercase Letters (A, B, C, D...).
• Rewrite four or more detailed scene(s) in the book from the perspective of the minor character.

 

Journal Entries:

 

Journal entries are brief paragraphs (4-6 complete sentences per entry) involving your version of this fairy tale. The paragraphs briefly describe the main parts of your story from the minor character's perspective. Upon completion of your fairy tale, review the whole story from the beginning to the end. Then take a look at the first part of your fairy tale, is there something in this section of significance you think is important to use as a journal entry?  Document this information and move on to next journal entry. You will continue to read and review each section of your fairy tale to determine which parts of your story can be used as a journal entry. It's important to note, you may need to brainstorm these entries first before you decide which parts you intend to use as your journal entries. If you have any questions about this assignment, please do not hesitate to contact me through Messages. My information is listed in the Course Menu under Instructor Info.

 

Outline Directions:

 

Note: I understand there are some of you who do know how to do an outline, but I thought the information below would help those of you who are not sure how to complete this section.

 

1. An outline is separated into sections marked with Roman Numerals (I, II, III, IV, etc...) or Uppercase Letters (A., B., C., D.).
2. Each section begins with a brief title involving the major points you believe are most important in your story.
3. Underneath each Roman Numeral title, student will enter a set of lowercase letters in a, b, c order.
4. Or underneath each Uppercase Letter title, student will enter a set of numbers in 1,2,3 order.
5. Beside the lowercase letters, student will briefly submit important bullet statements in relation to each Roman Numeral title.
6. Or beside the set of numbers, student will briefly submit important bullet statements in relation to each Uppercase Letter title.
7. Each Roman Numeral title should contain at least two bullet statements.
8. Or each Uppercase Letter title should contain at least two bullet statements.
9. Depending on the length of your story as to how many Roman Numerals one needs along with the lowercase letter bullet statements.
10. Or depending on the length of your story as to how many Uppercase Letters one needs along with the set of number bullet statements.

 

Attachments:

• 1499962096-20160720135415project_2.docx